1st: Throwaway account so it's not linked back to my regular account
Honestly, why is it that my child can suddenly be admitted to a mental facility for non stop negative thoughts, I'm going through multiple rounds of specialists who are trying to negate whether I have MS, or a similar vascular disease or if deep inside my sinuses is an infection that is causing some if not all of the symptoms.
I feel like I failed my child. His doctor wasn't sure what steps to take, amd I am stuck in between expensive arguing specialists who have some answers for symptoms but neither cover everything affecting me. Also, I contracted scabies frok am employee but was 1st misdiagnosed with a viral infection for more than a week and in between all of it I was trying to find additional support for my child who has regularly seen a pediatrician, psychiatrist and weekly therapist for the past 5 years because I could tell he was off and he doesn't actively like participating in telling his docs the truth.
I feel like I am failing as a mother. The in-patient facility has already scolded me because I couldn't talk when they initially called because I was getting ready to have a camera stuck up my nose which I've waited weeks to get into, and now my son thinks that I'm not doing everything I can to help him get home because he states he now realized that his life isn't so bad. I am barely able to keep up with all the responsibilities I need to. Work is encouraging me to take FMLA but I cannot afford to as I have already racked up $5K in medical debt that doesn't even include today's CT scan and the 2 MRI'S later this week. I'm just barely holding it together and so many people wrote my son off as an, "asshole" because they fail to understand how his diagnosis truly affect him so I don't have a lot of people to help. I'm already at my whits end and I still have to go through a bunch of tests this week, participate in family therapy and if he's released find the ability to drive 90 minutes away to bring him home. I've been through a lot in my life and somehow I always make it through but right now I'm struggling to find the light at the end of this tunnel. I find it sad that I'm hoping for a diagnosis rather than everything saying I'm fine. I know some things I'm experiencing are real such as my lack of desire, numbness that starts at the waist and my inability to have sex but if we cant find the reason with the upcoming tests that are scheduled I am not sure what I will do. I've at least submitted a request to my insurance for a case manager for my son as well as myself and I hope that this will help delegate some of the responsibilities of trying to find which facilities and docs both my child and I need. I've also only told a handful of family and friends about the medical stuff I'm going through as I don't know exactly what I'm facing so there isn't a need to worry anyone with the unknown. I just wish my Dad was here because he had such a fuck it mentality that I really need in my life right now.
Read more: reddit.com